Sunday, October 18, 2009, 3:23 PM
We had it all in front of us.

Whatever happened to the innocence we used to possess?
Talking on the phone for hours was thought-provoking. Many things I didn't understand. Who's genuine? Who's superficial? I've been doubting many things. Intentions, motives and what have shaped us into who we are today. Many incidents have changed my perspective of life. Why or who are living for? Life isn't all that pretty. But when you have the assurance that someone is always there for you, things may seem a little better.
I don't know how to phrase it but it seemed like as if we were a little distant. There's just this barrier that prevents me to get over to your side. You told me bout trust but I don't think I've fully convinced you. I tried my best but it doesn't seem to go far. What can I do, girl, to ever make you feel better?
I've been through that phase. It was such a long and hard time. I seemed to not know what's going to happen. Going around aimlessly. Thinking hard enough, what I could do to salvage the situation. You don't have always have to show that you're happy. I can't help it but to smile and laugh everyday. Not looking upset. Hoping that no one knows that you're certainly not alright. Keeps your friends from the least of worrying bout you, yes.
It hits you when you're randomly reflecting on something. Alone. Reflecting on things that happened in everyday life. Thinking hard and long doesn't make much a difference. Getting all that headaches makes me wanna sleep. Probably, sleeping through it has helped. Still, the problem exists.
The question again is: Does she love me as much as I love her?
If I knew then What I know today, Would everything Be going this way. Would it be different, would it be the same, Could it be that There's no one to blame?
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